Go to sleep

Me: Hey mom! I've been trying to get a hold of you for hours! How are you doing?

Mom: I'm sick. I feel like crap. My nose is stuffy and I think I have a fever. I'm going to bed now. [ed. note: at 2 pm]

Me: I'm so sorry to hear you're not feeling well! Go to sleep.

Mom: Ted [the cat] just came in. He's all muddy.

Me: Well you should put him back outside then

Mom: He won't let me touch him.

Me: I'm sorry to hear that

Mom: Now the cats are dancing on the table.

Me: Mom, that's a hallucination. Go to sleep.

Ted, the possibly-dancing cat